Of beauty pageants and the definition of beauty

I was watching a recent beauty pageant and it struck me how the clarification of beauty is defined, the yardstick of what's alluring and what is not, And, it just seemed not right.

The classifications of statistics of 'figure' which is perfect and desirable are liberally incorporated when beauty pageants were founded and then commercialized. And then, the girls are being 'objectified' rather than 'identified'.

Beauty pageants have this particular, narrow category of what 'beauty' is. Certain statistics are considered pulchritude, others, unsightly or even grotesque.

Beauty pageants never acknowledge women's individuality and they never represent women everywhere like the contestants so often claim, that they want to empower women everywhere.

Ok, one may argue that it is not everything about external appearance; it's about some brain muscle too. But, can a brainy plus sized women win a beauty pageant? Forget winning, can she even be allowed to enter a beauty pageant? Of course not because she is considered ineligible for not having a certain 'figure'. Women come in all shapes and sizes and to say that certain shape is beautiful and others are not is downright demoralizing and unfair.

You may say that in the same way, oversized men can't win Mr Universe; they gotta do what it takes; hit the gym and build those rippling muscles. But Mr World is rather underplayed compared to beauty pageants for women; I'm talking about which is more prevalent and publicized more.

As for actors and actresses, they come in all kinds of shapes and sizes and mesmerize audience with their talent rather than their appearance.

This epidemic of beauty pageants exists to satiate vouyeristic males. It is men's way of saying they rule over women You might say that there is a question session where the contestants' intellect is put to the test but it is only for about 5 minutes and less, the rest of the pageant's session consists of showing skin.

I am not against girls flaunting their assets but they should be comfortable with their body no matter if their size is zero or XXL. But what is the message beauty pageants convey to ordinary girls out there? That fat is bad news and girls who are on the heavier side are rated not beauty queen material.

At a time where women stand shoulder to shoulder with men, it's a shame that women are still viewed as objects of sexual gratification rather than she being seen as the person beyond her body and gender. Her capability, capacity, potential and dynamism as an opposite number and a team player to men should be acknowledged first and foremost because that is what stays and makes a lasting impression.

I know that beauty pageants won't stop churning out so called 'perfecto ladies' at my rant. Just getting an issue off my chest here.

Malaysian Indian Facebook girls

Lately, Facebook pages which highlight Malaysian Indian girls based heavily on their scant dressing sense have mushroomed in full view for the Indian masses here.

Such pages' admins justify that they are teaching a lesson on how to dress and behave to these girls while calling them sluts, bitches, whores, etc. In the lame pretext of moral policing the girls, those who operate the pages allow vulgar comments and the soliciting of the mobile numbers from fans of the girls featured on such pages. And, they call this 'educating' vandis and playgirls and those girls who reveal their body publicly in Facebook.

And then there are girls who provide a surplus of material for these sick minds to prey on.

In case you are wondering what 'vandi' means, it means a ride, pinpointing girls that random guys can screw.
Not a pretty term, I know.

The people who comment against such pages, me included will be bombarded with pure profanity by the admin..

It is astounding how much profanity I have to undergo in order to knock some sense into all those admins operating pages that demean Malaysian Indian girls. Perhaps they hold a doctorate for cussing. 

For those girls who upload pics of them in revealing clothes and bath towels why are you doing what you are doing? Have some discretion and express yourself and worthiness by your intelligence and wit and not by your capability of dressing and posing like Shakeela or Mallika Sherawat. They get paid to reveal their physique and you do it gratuitously. Why?? 

I can take wild guesses WHY.

You think, (I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt that you are innocent and unassuming of the bad, bad world out there) that showing off such revealing pictures of yours to get some likes. Well, honey, there is more to life than likes on Facebook.

And, another one, attention seeking at all the wrong ends and means. If a guy comments, "Hot and sexy" on your photo of you wearing little cloth, you will like it and the message you give to the guy is that yes, you are indeed a vandi and he will take every chance to screw you.

You will happily lap up all the attention but the moment you find out that your pics have been featured on such pages, you will go, "Aiyo, amma, saami, kaapatunggeh." and rush to salvage what little dignity you have left.

Well, my friends and I are trying to fight for your dignity here because we are women just like you.

Of course you have the freedom to dress and upload your photos as you like but as you go about it, you should take all the precautions necessary so that your photos don't fall into the wrong hands. Your body is  your temple and your responsibility.

Giving you the benefit of the doubt for your apparent lack of understanding on online media security and your  frivolity in adding friends also contribute for the misuse of your photos and they end up in such pages by the doing of your 'friends'. Leave such pages, your so called friends might have saved your pics in their PCs and circulate them in porn sites.

If you have the fetish to upload scantily clad photos of yours on Facebook, set the privacy appropriately. Facebook has given you that choice. If you choose for your photo to be viewed publicly, face both the positive and negative consequences that comes with your choice.

Before you jump at me that I'm outdated and irrelevant to present times and even pattikadu while you girls are civilized, know that being civilized also means knowing that uncivilized people live among us and in order for them not to show their incivility, you should be discreet in whatever you do especially your activities in Facebook and other social networks in order to stay safe.

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This clamour that we are modern girls so we dress modern rings shallow when what you are doing is just aping the West. 

Trouble comes to women in many faces. It is wise to not invite more trouble online because we already have ample trouble in real life.

A justification of the choice to wear or not to wear pottu

My contention of the wearing of pottu or not wearing a pottu sparked a debate that not wearing a pottu will disintegrate our culture and custom. As an Indian Hindu girl, pottu is seen as a must a typical patriarchal perspective. If an Indian girl chooses not to wear pottu, the opposite gender gets incredulous and quickly criticize the girl for not following Indian culture.

See, I can rephrase. How many Indian guys wear veshti sattai nowadays, to places they go? Do you wear it to schools to meet teachers, to the hospital or Thaipusam? Most comes to most, guys only wear veshti sattei to temples, that too, not exactly a dime a dozen. Ladies wear pottu to temples, the priest gives vermillion and ladies dab it on their foreheads.

My Indian female teachers wear sari to school and one of them, (she was married) didn't wear pottu. Do any Indian male teacher wear veshti sattai to school or work?
You see, it had come to the point where comfort overrides culture.

The tacit unwillingness of Indian guys to wear veshti sattei is never questioned. Nobody say a word when guys don't come to temple wearing veshti sattei but if an Indian girl doesn't wear pottu, judging her on that basis becomes all too easy and it also contains double standards and subtle subjugation.

In most cases, the only time an Indian guy wears veshti sattei is on his wedding. A girl too, decks her hair up with flowers, wear a glittering sari and a kunguma pottu. Humans are social creatures. Humans meaning both male, female and other so why target to a specific gender. This logic should apply impartially, not partially, encompassing, not narrowed.

A tiny dot, if it not worn by women would damage our culture and identity? If not wearing pottu is considered pernicious to our culture so is the not donning of veshti sattai on a regular basis. It works both ways.

In India, ladies wear sari at home; ladies here, don't. Again, comfort triumphs over culture Sari is only worn for auspicious occasions here.

One might argue that when it comes to fashion, comfort is often sacrificed by women. True. Wearing high heels, platform shoes, tight fitting jeans and mini skirts, heavy earrings and chokers are extremely uncomfortable. But, do ladies wear all that when they are at home? No. They only wear the stuff above when they go out to work, clubbing and socializing. At home, comfort reign supreme and culture as well as fashion are compromised.  

This sweeping change is called keeping up with times and needs. Culture is not lost if we don't wear our cultural costumes or pottu. It is a matter of liberation, an emancipation of human proportion.

Years ago, humans went everywhere by foot. Now, we are travelling in cars. As we progress, comfort becomes something to be indulged in. It is not excess; it's convenience. This quote is apt to this topic

In a time where female astronauts are orbiting space,note the late Kalpana Chawla, this type of talk is very demoralizing. Kalpana Chawla can only wear an astronaut suit in space. She can't wear sari out there and make sure she has pottu on her forehead.

To wear or not to wear pottu

Tradituonally, Indian women wear pottu for religious reasons. The spot where the pottu is placed, typically between the eyebrows, is thought to be the location of the sixth chakra, ajna, which is believed to be the seat of concealed wisdom. The pottu is placed in order to retain the energy and strengthen concentration.

Most Indian women don't do the research as per why pottu is worn, even I did not.

I never wore pottu during school days, just an upward streak of vibuthi which disappears as soon as I get of the crowded school bus in the morning.

My Indian schoolmates have criticized my quirk of not wearing pottu, saying that I am not Indian enough and even disrespectful of my religion since I don't wear pottu. Does a tiny dot in between my eyebrows determine my identity and religion? If it is so, then I should have a pottu on when I was born.

Wearing pottu these days is no longer a matter of religious conduct or the identification of an Indian woman; it has become a fashion statement and a matter of preference and volition, to wear pottu or not to wear pottu. It is a right, not an imposition.

The idea of pottu is a red one for married women and a black one for maidens. Some married women wear a streak of vermillion at the parting of hair on their foreheads.

But, commercialism and globalization didn't spare pottu. We now have colourful sticker pottus of all shapes and sizes worn by both married and unmarried Indian women. Westerners have started to wear pottu. From Indian culture, pottu has become a global phenomenon.

An Indian girl is an Indian girl whether she wears a pottu or not. Don't judge her character by a tiny dot on her forehead; that tiny dot doesn't determine her character.  


Selena Gomez wearing pottu

Estate

There is a general notion of high class Indians (so they call themselves) here that Indians from estates behave ignominiously, thus the brand, "Estate" for those Indians who get derailed from a righteous path, those who go to Tamil schools and those who dress gaudy. These so called high class Indians are quick to point their finger at other Indians who are perhaps less fortunate, off the right track or can't speak much English.

Many of us don't see this branding as offensive, perhaps even oblivious to it. But, this name calling is on par with the slur pariah. To those who like to call not so urban and tendy fellow Indians 'estate', where were you born? New York City? On Fridays, you will still have saambar rice at home but behave like you grew up eating pasta and grilled cheese sandwich.

Going by history, our great-great grandparents worked on crops plantations during colonial times while some were professional teachers and money lenders. That makes the origination of most of us estates. Just because we moved to cities doesn't make us cool or classy. Our heritage and ancestry lie in the estates we forsook for better lives and to keep up with times.

I was born in an estate known as Batu 21 in Teluk Intan and I had the time of my life growing up there and later, Kampung Sungai Timah in Hutan Melintang. I would go fishing, climb trees and just gallivant the estate which nurtured me. Snakes, eagles, river otters and owls were common place and it was completely swell growing up where and the way I did. How many of us have seen a cocoa fruit, de husk a coconut, drink milk straight from a cow's udder and know how to tap rubber trees? I do and I'm proud to say that I am from an estate. Never forget our roots and humble beginnings no matter how high we may climb in our lives.

Somebody gonna get hurt real bad

There is a debate on to beat or not to beat your kids. Some believe in gentle love upbringing and some swear by the tough love upbringing.

My upbringing was of the latter style. One red cross in my marked homework and my left palm would pay the price; my mom would cane that extremity of mine, one blow for one red cross. If you are wondering why my left upper limb bears the brunt, I am left handed and my mom makes it a point to hit the very appendage which made the mistake.

My mom, no matter how exhausted she was, would make it a point to check my marked homework and if there were mistakes, I would be dead meat, figuratively.

She was extremely creative in selecting tools to whack my ass. The items consist of broom, clothes hanger, ladle, belt, pipe hose and plant twigs. As a child, I had the wish to make those items disappear from existence.

I was also smacked for my constant mischief and foibles. From 4 years old to 16 years old, it was the same drill but the intensity of it was assuaged considering me growing up and maturing.

I was never given much pocket money to school. During my primary school days, it was 20 cents and since my mom packs me homemade food to eat during recess, the 20 cents went right into my piggy bank. In secondary school, my pocket money was 50 cents and for public bus fare, my mom would give me RM2.

I only owned a wallet when I turned 15 and if you guys think that my wallet was a high end item, well, nope. It was a five bucks wallet I purchased from the pasar malam. (night market)

My father never yelled at me, let alone hit me. But, he never stopped his wife from making mince meat of me due to my perpetual monkey business and carelessness in homework. He tacitly knows what my mom is doing is right.

After passing in PMR in flying colours, hits from mom came to an abrupt halt. She no longer spanked me for mistakes in my homework. Instead, she began to tell me this,"I see you made a mistake and I know that you are intelligent enough to figure out what is wrong and do better next time."

Her words astounded me and it brought me to the realization that my Mother was sculpting me into perfection; each blow from her is the making of me. And when I proved that I am now moulded into a capable person, she set me free, trusting me 100%. And, I pledged to myself that I will never breach that trust she has on me. 

The greatest gift any parent can give to their children is trust.

But trusting parental trust on children can be a curse, especially in this era.  

Parents fully trust their children, give in to their every whim and fancy, and lavish their children with smart phones, video games and adolescent fancies. 

Such kids take their parents' trust for granted and go on orgies of decadence, their parents, oblivious of their activities.

Kids, not knowing what is right and wrong, slip into waywardness and get into deep trouble due to the condoning from parents.

There is a moral ground when it comes to instilling righteous capabilities in children and some spanking when they derail is fair enough. It is for them to not make a botch in the future. Action speaks louder than words. 

My mom inculcated discipline, cautiousness, prudence and virtuousness in me by flogging me.

I am thankful that my Mom raised me the way she did. I will be forever grateful.

 

Tun Dr Mahathir, do keep your self respect intact

I used to revere Tun Dr Mahathir; I am, after all a product of his period and until now, I respect him as an elderly man even though his misdeeds affected me and my compatriots adversely. My mother taught me to respect my elders.

But, my respect for Mahathir and my hold to my mom's advice is increasingly becoming tenuous now as the octogenarian gradually morphed into a loose cannon, making racist, unwarranted, unfounded, vacuous comments that are winning vitriol from the Malaysian masses.

As a well aged man whose current stature is already unpopular for his past crimes as Prime Minister, him, fostering racial polarization, biased national policies, the attrition of the quality, transparency and independence of education, judicial system, the power of the Malay rulers, the imposing of totalitarian control over the media and the issuing of blue IC for immigrants in Sabah to ascertain his political survival and whatnot, he should be reticent and be in repentant mode in a private way.

But, what does he do? The direct opposite. Instead of having the grace of his predecessors and his only successor, Tun Abdulah Ahmad Badawi, Mahathir is engaging in public gaffe, displeasing the rakyat as a whole.

With all due respect Malaysians have on Tun Dr Mahathir does not mean they won't get incensed when he makes ethnocentric remarks and issue a clarion call for the investigation of the citizenship given to the Chinese and Indians at pre-independence, justifying that if what Tunku Abdul Rahman did back then, that is, bestowing citizenship to the Chinese and Indians of the days of colonial withdrawal is righteous then the Project IC in Sabah masterminded by our 4th prime minister is also righteous.

The Chinese and Indians have lived in Malaya for generations in the British colonial times. They procreated here, picked up Malay language and soaked in Malayan soil, their respective motherlands, long forsaken.

The Chinese and Indians together with the Malays built Malaysia together, shedding sweat, tears and blood and forged a strong bond. The bond was made stronger by Tunku when he bestowed the deserved denizens citizenship abiding by the jus soli, that is, the right of soil principle true to the tenet of a multi racial demography and formed Malaysia. Those Chinese and Indians were calling Malaya home for more than 2 generations which sanctions Tunku's action.

In contra with Tunku's deed, Tun Dr Mahathir granted citizenship to the immigrants in Sabah in a matter of months of their arrival. Surely their patriotism and loyalty to Malaysia are questionable if not obvious. What did they contribute to Malaysia to deserve citizenship? Were they in PR status for at least 15 years to be eligible for citizenship? The answer is a deafening no. The objective behind Project IC is a self serving one, serving none other the swashbuckler Tun Dr Mahathir, allowing him to remain in power longer, until his avarice and sedition got satiated.

Not so fast we can leave Dr Mahathir off the hook for putting forth bemusing vindications and wild allegations which are virulent which is dangerous for a united Malaysia. His rash comments will disintegrate the very fabric of Malaysia's multi-racial and multi-cultural and multi-religious society. As the longest serving PM of Malaysia, Tun Dr Mahathir should know this as a fact and if he truly loves his country, such sordid accusations and division creating revelations should not come from a respectable public figure that he is.

 Tun Dr Mahathir sure has a lot of knowledge but somehow lacks eclectic wisdom that ripens through age; his recent numerous faux pas is testimony for this claim of mine. There is a saying which goes, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." Despite seeing generation after generation evolve and revolve before his very eyes, Tun Dr Mahathir is failing to be relevant and wise and that borderlines revulsion.

The Indian Dilemma

I bought the Hindraf DVD outlining this blueprint on Thaipusam day and watched it. I watched it along with my mother. My mom always watches the programme Vizhuthugal on Astro Vaanavil and TV2 Tamil news where BN blows it's own trumpet that it is a caring government doling out goodies and the proposed national celebration of Ponggal. I stopped listening to and reading mainstream news a long time ago whilst my mother depends on it for information of the goings on.  

Basically, in that DVD, Hindraf had outlined its six-point blueprint during the group’s fifth year anniversary celebration last November.

The six points are:

1) Stop displacing Indian plantation workers and provide reasonable compensation as well as offer skills training to them;

2) Resolve Indian stateless issue;

3) Provide equal education opportunities to all Indian students via meritocracy;

4) Provide equal job and business opportunities to Indians;

5) Stop police brutality and death in custody, and set up the Independent Police Complaints and Misconduct Commission (IPCMC); and

6) Stop institutionalised racism and ratify United Nations convention against racial discrimination.

With all that said and heard one day, my mom came up to me and said that BN seems to care for Indians with all the feel good festivities organizing and goodies galore and told me that she would vote for BN since BN seems to have repented. She is also sizably concerned about riotous skirmishes that might take place if PR takes seat in Putrajaya.

Now, this is the problem of Indians here, the Indian dilemma, prevalent especially among the aged and those in rural areas, my mother included. We tend to settle for temporary provisions and succumb to gratification when our festivals are given hype. We have a short memory and are driven by gratitude which is knowingly preyed on by the ruling coalition. And, fear mongering is another factor that would make unthinking Indians become BN's vote repository again.

The dilemma of Indians here is that they are happy if they are given a fish a day rather than learning the skill of fishing and upgrade the skill in order to develop themselves and BN is capitalizing on this stumble of ours. This trait alone befits the claim that Indians are pathetic beggars. Why get angry when others call us beggars when we act like beggars?

Indians here don't have ahead of time and critical thinking. Our kids don't get seats in public universities scholarships despite being more than qualified, their spirits, crushed, ambition, quelled, potential and capability, repressed and yet for a meager RM 500, a packet of rice, few cans of sardine and other groceries and a nationwide Ponggal celebration and we are already more than willing to lick the boots of BN goons and cast our votes to the very political entity that pretty much denied our existence and our contribution of building Malaysia for the past 55 long years.

These goodies galore and the celebrations are nothing but kiss ass gestures to gain the canvass of the Indian community back for BN. We must ask ourselves, why only now BN has come up with the term Nambikei and is giving us a literal yet non sustainable windfall? What were they smoking in the period of 55 years of rule? Why only after failure of getting 2/3rd majority is BN paying attention to Indians and why is the handouts parcel out executed so close to the General Election? Is it because they had a sudden enlightenment? Is it because they have turned on a new leaf and sincerely want to serve the Indian community? HELL, NO! BN is doing this for its own political survival and this Nambikei thingy and the splurge are their 11th hour attempts. It is do or die. Najib wants to preserve his position as PM; that is his only motive. If Najib is truly sincere to uplift the Indian community sincerely he should have implemented long term nitty gritty uplifting policies and supplementary monetary aid the minute he got sworn in as our PM, in genuine and impartial parallel with his 1Malaysia policy. Why he didn't do it? Why wait until so close to 13th GE to do so? You do the math.

A bag of 5kg rice with Najib's photo on the bag, lucky draws and lots of Kollywood movies are good enough for Indians to sell their future. I still remember, in 2008, TV2 aired the Tamil movie Mozhi as the 12th GE went on. I remember being angry at BN for thinking that with the airing of Kollywood movies, Indian votes will go to BN. I won't blame BN for thinking of Indians as cheap; we have showed that we are cheap and mindless for voting for BN in exchange for peanuts.  That is what we have been doing for 55 years. 

Kowtowing MIC have failed the Indians, the very people it represents. Time to change the ballgame. The time is ripe to say to either BN or PR, whichever holds the reins of the nation that "I demand, you listen and give me what I want because I am your boss. I put you where you are to serve me and there are no two ways about it. You under perform and watch me kick you out in the next election." It is time for a populist statecraft be launched in Malaysia. 

And the money Najib is throwing at us is not his appan veetu sotthu. It is the tax payers' money, the people's money, OUR money. And as a PM, it is his job to look after the people. We pay his salary; he is our servant. Ever heard of a subordinate idolize himself to his boss? That is how silly it is and Najib adulates himself shamelessly and we are accepting this silliness as a rightful thing. Again, only in Malaysia. So guys, my fellow Indians, who are you going to vote for this time around? Me, the OBVIOUS!

Malaysian Identity Crisis

I am sure all Malaysians, especially public universities' students and netizens are well aware of the issue of KS Bawani. The second year law student took on Suara Wanita 1Malaysia president, Sharifah Zohra Jabeen at a forum titled, 'Are University Students in Line with Politics', last month in UUM, acronym for Universiti Utara Malaysia when she got interrupted disdainfully and further spurned and humiliated by the moderator who did not give the due chance to Bawani who was proposing an idea of free education and the condition of Bersih as lawful to finish her articulation.

Universities are supposed to promote critical and cogent thinking in students, not to mention the cultivation of sensible and mature semblances outfitted for the competitive world outside. Questioning and vantage point sharing should be encouraged in order for undergraduates to equip themselves with the skills needed to hack out a professional position independently.

But, what happens in Malaysian public universities? Every time a new idea gets proposed or a revolutionary statement are made, students, especially those belonging to a minority race are told to sit down and be thankful for being where they are now and be complacent with what they do have and that they actually get more than what they deserve, their voice, malignantly stifled. 

When students of minority races compare Malaysia to other nations of better standards to form a parallel and later forward idealistic yet applicable and viable brainwaves based on the substandard yet can be improved status quo, besetting our soil, they are told to leave the country if they don't like it here, giving a basal comparison on others who are not challenging the system, those, more often than not, completely brainwashed, who are seemingly content and happy with the existent system when they are actually convinced, not cognizant. 

That is why Malaysia is suffering from chronic brain drain. Students and professionals flee the country and stay put overseas with no interest in returning to serve Malaysia with the logic, "Why stay in your own country where you are treated like a dispensable unit when the world welcomes you with open arms?" 

We mustn't settle for mediocrity and succumb to brainwashing; we should strive to reach the greatest heights possible, come up with revolutionary and out of the box ideals and question redundant, dubious, obscure and fallacious establishments and preaching sessions via open forums. Until this idea gets imbibed into every authority in public tertiary institutions here, we will continue to churn out run off mill public universities graduates with little market value and competitive edge. 

Excellence should not be compromised for anything. Start compromising education excellence for inferior quality education and watch the nation rot and ruin. 

Likewise for politicizing education; no university student should bear the onus of having a specified political affiliation that would cost them their education and career. The government of the day should let students make choices, not determine their choice for them. A government has no right to propagate its ideology and subtly force students to accept everything they say. That is bullying. Start politicizing education and watch donkeys run the country.



The funny and pathetic thing I discerned in the forum was the audience comprising of tertiary education students applauding Bawani as she spoke and did the same when Sharifah engaged in gross verbal faux paus.

This shows that public universities students have no bearing over having a firm stand and standing up for what they think as righteous. They should have the characteristic of holding their ground and agree to disagree and challenge speeches relatively. It is the repercussion of the repression of questioning and incessant brainwashing and dumbing down. "Listen, listen. listen, let me speak and you shut up." Our public universities are producing well trained parrots, not well educated graduates. Main angguk aje, jadi Pak Turut.

Another aspect which silences students is fear mongering; that change would put their education and life at grave risk thus the rejection of revolutions and political awareness and political participation among graduate students.

Now, for the Malaysian Identity Crisis. Bawani is an Indian. Yes. That is her ethnicity. Nothing more, nothing less. Ethnicity is merely a stamp on our DNA; that is all that is. Ethnicity doesn't determine intelligence and ingenuity. Environment, awareness, industrious attitude and effort does. That is what Bawani showcased in the forum. Pure brilliance in a stentorian tone.

Bawani spoke of free education and she was anything but ill equipped. She had done a thorough research and had gleaned statistics, facts and figures to back her revelation. She knew her stuff. She knew what she was talking about. The mediator didn't; she was a gross red herring. She babbled on and on about her disappointment of animals not having it easy and asked Bawani what is she doing in Malaysia if she doesn't like it here. What Madam Sharifah did that day was bullying and her counter to Bawani was bunkum.

Later, came libel; racist comments targeting Bawani from the very branch of the to date ruling regime. Bawani was told to go back to India if she wants a free education and Indians were ridiculed of not knowing the existence of toilets back in the estates

Many are infuriated by these insinuation pitted against Bawani. Emotionally driven,  And, this is where the Malaysian Identity Crisis comes into view.

Angered Indians (Excuse me for pinpointing a particular race here. It is because the description I am making demands it.) on social networks here, succumbing to vengeance, rebuke Malays that they at least have a place to return to whereas Malays don't when they are told to go back to India. They counter that Malays have multiple ancestral bloodlines like Indonesian, Siamese, Arab, Persian, Indian and Chinese bloodlines making them native less, hence they being immigrants as well.

And then, there is a notion that if it wasn't for Malays' laziness, Indians and Chinese would not be here in Malaysia today. The Malays were indisposed to do hard labour in rubber plantations and mines during British colonization of Malaya, thus the British brought the Chinese and Indian here for manpower that Malays failed to fill up hence the migration and later, involuntary assimilation.

Sweet payback but does it settle the scores and solve our problems? IT DOES NOT. It only exacerbates the situation and compounds the problem. No point bickering like children.

Indians get riled up if we are called keling (a derogatory slang used to demean Indians) or hitam (black) or India bodoh (stupid Indian) At the same time, Indians call Malays naatukaren (man of the country) and Chinese, sadaiyen. (a slur describing Chinese people)

When we ourselves have so much dirt on our backs, who are we to complain that other people's backs are dirty? We refer to Malays as man of the country in a separatist view and by doing that, we are detaching ourselves from Malaysia, the very soil we are born on!! Being born on Malaysian soil factually makes us man of the country along with our compatriots. Why do we complain about others being racists when we are racists ourselves with a divisive mentality?

When Bawani spoke of free education, she meant free education for all Malaysians, not for a particular creed. She has set a precedent to be followed through and an exemplary of championing Malaysians. Sharifah's backers told Bawani to go back to India if she is not happy here. The statement itself is wrong. Bawani wasn't born in India; she was born in Malaysia and if there is anywhere she should go back to, it is Malaysia.

It is high time we resolve the Malaysian Identity Crisis. Malaysia is not Malaysia without the Malays, Chinese, Indians, the indigenous people and whatnot. No one has the right to tell a fellow citizen to get out of Malaysia if he or she says that they have a bone to pick with a Malaysian system that seems to be out of whack. Instead, us, as Malaysians should work homogeneously and harmoniously in the weeding out the problem for the betterment of all Malaysians irrespective of race, religion and social status.

We built Malaysia together, are building Malaysia together and we will build Malaysia together and our identity is Malaysian. DOT.

Teeth that bite or mentality change?

Caution: The following article is very graphic in description. Reader discretion is advised.

Since I was a child, my Dad always tells me to be wary of strangers and do not accept anything offered by those who I don't know. And, it was the same drill until I was 19. (He had passed away when I was 19.). I used to roll my eyes at his caveat every time as a teen and tell him not to baby me. Now, I know that his fear has a very good reason.

Women have so much to fear. And, the fear and malaise is almost always inflicted by the Adam kind. We have to be fearful of the very persons who are supposed to protect us. From how many people should women run away for dear life and dignity from? From close relatives in the case of incest, from educators, from rogue men, from colleagues, from employers and the list is endless.

Rape happens even in countries where the women are covered from head or toe. It is not a sex thingy; it's a display of power like dogs pissing on walls to stake their territory.

Rape doesn't mean only forced intercourse; it is more than that. Rape is grossly compartmentalized. Are women not raped every day when we walk down the street and leered at? Are women not raped when we are considered as nothing more than sex objects, our rights, denied and we getting subject to oppression in a myriad of ways? 

It is only of late where women are venturing out to create a niche for themselves and show competence in a Man's World. These type of men will send women back into the kitchen and forestall the rightful progression of women. I am not succumbing to misandry. I know that there are many gentlemen out there who are repulsed by crimes against women.

Take a look at this.

Any idea of what is this and what is its purpose?

No idea?

I will tell you then.

Rape was becoming widespread in South Africa, so a medical technician, Sonette Ehlers developed a product that immediately got national attention there. Ehlers had never forgotten a rape victim telling him, "If only I had teeth down there."

Some time afterwards, a man came into the hospital where Ehlers works in excruciating pain because his penis got stuck in his zipper.

Ehlers merged both ideas and invented a product she called RAPEX. It resembles a tube with barbs inside. A woman inserts it into her vagina like a tampon, with an applicator and any man who tries to rape the woman impales his penis on the barbs and must go to an emergency room to have the RAPEX removed.

When critics complained that it is a medieval punishment, Ehlers tersely replied, "A medieval punishment for a medieval deed."

Yes, rape is a primitive deed, spanning cavemen times where a caveman would bang a cavewoman at his whim and fancy. Rape is not classified as a crime until recently in the history of mankind where human rights, women's rights and feminists surfaced in order to create a truly liberate, liberal and civilized society.

The question that arises and even necessitated here is whether our society today is truly liberate, liberal and civilized.

Rape is an ancient, tried and tested universal crime, the drawing of a distinction only being the frequency of this heinous, malicious deed committed around the world.

Rape has been used as a war tactic to subdue women because terrorizing a society's women is as good as disabling it and later, in due time, obliterate the whole society. This is true in African nations infested with civil war, Sri Lanka, Bosnia Herzegovina, Taliban, Khmer Rouge and whatnot. 

And, RAPEX is not a new tool designed to prevent rape. There is a folk tale of Vagina dentata which is Latin for toothed vagina. I read about this some time back when I was in high school and my memory got refreshed by the recent gang rape case in Delhi, India which sent India into insurgence, demanding justice. 

Vagina dentata describes a folk tale in which a woman's vagina is said to contain teeth, with the associated implication that sexual intercourse might result injury to the penis or castration.

This tale is told to discourage rape and coitus with strange women.

Now, let's look out at the benefits of RAPEX.

Once a rapist gets bit by RAPEX, he would be subject to unbearable pain and maybe even risk impotency. He has to go to an emergency room to remove the RAPEX. So, he can be immediately convicted of rape and be tried in the court of law. I'd shoot him in point blank range, rather.

Along with puberty talks in high school and the distribution of sanitary napkins, perhaps RAPEX should be distributed too. For that to happen, RAPEX should be mass produced like condom and make men aware of the existence of RAPEX and let them contemplate on being Rapexed. I can totally imagine a guy getting Rapexed! Sweet revenge!

It might deter rape and rapists but it is subject to moot. The practicality of RAPEX seems to be wanting.

In cases of gang rape, this tool may backfire. After the first goer rapist kena gigit, surely the others in aid and abet would be in cognizance of the vagina dentata and rape the girl more violently in provocation. After they are done with their sick business, they might clobber the girl savagely or even kill her.

The 23 years old medical student who was gang raped in a moving bus had resisted her aggressors and in order to make her docile and to put her in her place, an iron rod was rammed into her vagina which perforated her uterus, small intestines and big intestines. Later, they practically disemboweled her by pulling her insides out. Bone chilling as this is, RAPEX won't be of any help in similar scenarios of rape.

What if the rapist indulges in fingering and oral sex foremost and discovers the RAPEX lodged inside the woman's vagina? Maybe he would remove the anti rape kit and rape her more violently than what he initially had in mind. The removal of RAPEX maybe similar to the removal of tampons, I can't tell for sure.

There is a probability of RAPEX injuring the woman wearing it. It is, of cause a foreign object with the same purpose to a certain extent of chastity belts, the only difference being Vagina dentata being worn inside the body.

A chastity belt is a locking item of clothing designed to prevent sexual intercourse. They may be used to protect the wearer from rape or temptation. Some devices have been designed with additional features to prevent masturbation. Chastity belts have been created for both males and females ostensibly for the purpose of chastity.

Chastity belt is also not a new invention; it dates back to the age of the Crusades. When the knight left for the Holy lands, his Lady would wear a chastity belt to preserve her faithfulness to him. So much for matrimonial trust.

Other resources say that chastity belts were used in the Middle Ages and the Renaissance period, a hundred years after the final Crusade.

Recent developments of the chastity belt has been made but they are far and few in between and is not contained in up to times practicality.

Perhaps the most effective way to prevent sex crimes lies in a change in mindset. Males should be taught not to rape and to respect women, after all, they came from a woman's womb and exited through her vagina. Awareness and ethics remain to be the most powerful tool to curb rape anywhere.

In a domestic level, mindsets need to have a paradigm shift. Internalized patriarchal systems should be atoned, male supremacy, given to redundant practices. Instead of telling girls how to dress and not to stay out late, drill in the idea in guys that if a girl wears revealing clothes and stays out until late at night or is comfortable and amiable and enjoys male company is an invitation or even a validation to inflict hurt on her in any form and manifestation in order to subdue her or 'teach her a lesson'. The only lesson is, men should NOT RAPE. If her dressing provoked males to rape, then I should break those males' face because their temerity provoked me. Who gave the right for men to be women's moral police? So, she took the bus late at night so, she must not be a virgin and maybe even promiscuous and for that raping her is warranted. She taking the night bus home is  not the perversion, the perversion is in the mind of the rapists.

I have come across guys who think girls who has guys as friends are nothing but low life bitches and sluts and ought to be 'corrected'. And, it is here, in Malaysia. I don't know what or who gave them the right and authority to 'correct' girls, if you know what I mean. It is not the girls who need to be 'corrected'; If there is anything that demands to be 'corrected', it is the shitty mentality of such guys and this oppressing system. Chivalrous men's reputation gets defiled because of certain sick lots.

The orthodox notion that men are superior to women, men have rights which women should not have and men are women's conquerors contribute to rape, domestic abuse and sexual harassment. This has to change in order to prevent not only rape but all crimes against women.

And, then there is the factor of humiliation; thousands of rape cases go unreported and justice, denied for those who are victimized. If a woman is robbed and she surrenders herself to her assailants, not resisting batter in order to stay alive, no one blames her for being passive while terrorized. The scenario takes a cartwheel in the case of rape; a rape victim is asked why did she let them do it, why she did not resist and whether she enjoyed it.

As long as women are oppressed in varying ways, they will continue to be susceptible to rape. Mystifying rape needs to be stopped and it's existence around us must be acknowledged. Shrouding rape in secrecy should be stopped and rape should be seen as a violent crime in which the rapist is the cold blooded criminal.

Until the basis of the thought of underlying male supremacy that women are meant to be consigned into subjugation, until women cease to be regarded as the property of men, women will continue living in fear and constant insecurity of being ravaged with impunity. The only crime women are guilty of is being female. Nothing gets more unfair than that.

Modernity, from an Indian perspective

First of all, let us look at the definition of modern.

Modern - A person who advocates or practices a departure from traditional styles or values.

Now, let's look at how our Indian youth consider something as modern in their daily life.

Dressing sense : 

For guys, to dress in rapper style, wearing jackets and monkey caps under the sweltering Malaysian sun is considered modern. Not forgetting their dog chain lookalike bling.

There is also smartly dressed category, the donning of branded shirts and pants and sporting expensive and trendy accessories. Then, there is the funky style, guys who don't tuck in their shirts at the back, sporting piercings, tatoos and spike hairstyle. Guys with stubble, unshaven look and goatees who dress neatly attract females' attention for all the right reasons. First impression is the best impression.

For girls, the lesser the cloth covering their body, the more modern they are considered to be. Married women who don't wear their thali and metti is considered to have come out from their orthodox shell. For some females, following latest fashion in clothing, feminine accessories and makeup can be called modern girls. Girls who sport short hair with a vixen, sultry look can be categorized as modern. 

Conduct :

Drinking, smoking and clubbing are considered new age norms, which is contained in modernity. Getting piss drunk and swaying and jerking on the club dancefloor, coupling up, making out in free sex culture are hallmarks that herald advanced lifestyle. Basically Western culture is considered modern by denizens who populate other parts of the world and Malaysia is not an isolated case. 

Western culture came to our shores in the 70s in the form of hippie culture and entertainment from the United States which inundate our mass media and social networks. Losing virginity before marriage is considered cool and, the order of the day in these so called modern times. Sexual abstinence in pre-marital stage and chastity have been given wholesale to times gone by.

Body language :

The way one talks and the way one walks speak volumes of their tendency towards modernity. Making eye contact, straight gait when walking, holding head up high and strutting like they own the world is a modern body language. Speaking clearly and confidently with active gesticulation and the ability to adapt is also considered as modern.

But, adaptation can be described in an opposing context. Let me illustrate a case scenario. A girl from a backwater estate goes to Kuala Lumpur to pursue her tertiary education. From a wide eyed damsel, she morphed into a 'Raw ah adikere Rangeela' within a few months and get screwed all over in the name of modernization. 

Being modern doesn't mean you should lose or compromise your values, virtues, convictions and principles. Being modern means taking in new things and applying them in your life while having your pride and dignity intact. Sleeping around and dancing half naked and getting stoned in night clubs ain't modern. It is self destruction for both guys and girls and it is something that needs to be drilled into our youth's hard heads. 

I am not saying that having fun and socializing is wrong; I'm merely saying that we should be civil while clubbing and whatever self indulgent stuff we engage in. Harassing, invading the personal space of others as well as disrupting the peace of others after getting piss drunk are anything but honourable. The Chinese drink too but not a squeak comes from their indulgence. 

Becoming a modern person from streamline conservative usually springs at puberty, where curiosity and discovery of all things new are at their peak. I too, am experiencing all that and I've had my share of slip ups. The important thing is, to learn from our mistakes. 

But, being modern transcends dress code and conduct and body language.

Thought process and attitude towards outdated, redundant, obscure and partial establishments is where true modernization dwells and it is something that Indians here need to follow through.

The idea that women are inferior to men is a backward thinking. A guy who recognizes girls as his equal is a forward thinking, modern guy. The belief that male and female can see eye to eye and work together shoulder to shoulder is progressive thinking which is of course, modern. Confidence plays a critical role herein,  Bharathiyar has expounded this idea in the beginning of the 20th century. He became an iconoclastic and the emancipation of women exercised his mind greatly. That is something to exemplify.

Attitude, as in holding your own while yielding to brand new stuff and concepts will do wonders to your psyche. This is what I am discovering lately. You might be wronged and humiliated but whether you choose to crumble under the pressure or learn to deal with it without losing your core values is what is needed to be hip and happening. Confidence is sexy.  

To be modern, you don't have to wear bulky business suits and miniskirts. Whatever you wear, which comprises of your outfit, conduct, body language, thought process and attitude should suit your physique, congruent to the place you intend to go and in accord with your motive or goal.

Now, you are all set to rock the world modernly!